Being positive

I need to be more positive. There are days where I find it easier to cut myself down rather than find the better side of things. I need to keep days like this in check.

A year ago my husband finally introduced me to an actor (that he works with for a week every year) that I had a crush on since I was a young teenager. He was just being nice and asking me how my husband was able to snag me. My response to him was rather a rather negative view of myself. (I won't repeat it here)

That quick moment in my life has stuck with me pretty severe since then. It didn't dawn on me until a few days later that I was so negative. No one likes to be around negative people. Why was I putting my worst foot forward at a time I wanted to be one of my best?

Ok... so I've put on quite a few pounds with each pregnancy.... Ok... so I have a few grey hairs and I can't eat whatever I want without any consequences anymore. So what!?!?

I've lost over 40 pounds in 6 out of the past 7 months. I've hit a plateau and I need to get back into exercise mode. I am excited that I can wear regular jeans again and not sweat pants all the time. I have 5 amazing kids that I really enjoy watching them grow and change.

I don't know what I need but something needs to change. I NEED to be more positive... more happy... more content. This is my goal for 2010.


Confession time: I have a very hard time being around people who have more money than we do. The jealousy monster lurks just below the surface waiting for the chance to be heard. We have spent most of the past 15 years struggling just to keep our utilities on. When I hear that some family/friend went somewhere on a trip - rather than being happy for them and wanting to hear the details of their vacation my mind automatically heads towards... "must be nice to go on a trip.... must be nice to not have to worry how you're going to keep your mortgage paid or utilities on". I have found the only way I can "deal" with this bad trait is to just stay away from anyone who has more $ then we do. Needless to say... I don't get out much. This is another area where I could use some improvement.