Yesterday my husband scared me more than I have been in a long time. He has something wrong with his health. Doc's still don't know what. Probably never will... but we'll keep pumping cash into their pockets so they can afford their cars/houses/vacations.
Anyway... He hit what I would consider rock bottom. When he's not doing well he can't work, can't watch or help with the kids, can't totally take care of himself... I seriously thought he would just cease to exhist out of simply giving up. I've heard stories about people "dying of a broken heart"... I wonder if someone can die from feeling soooo horrible they just don't want to go through another day like that again. Thank goodness we don't drink or do drugs or I know he would be dead from an overdose.
I said some very emotional prayers (out of a lack of knowing what else to do). Shortly after he was inspired to take some Essential Amino Acid pills and for whatever reason he mostly snapped out of his funk. The spark came back in his eyes and he looked human again.
I have never seen anyone struggle so hard for so long trying to figure out what's up without any success. You should see our kitchen cabinets. 2 shelves FULL of bottles of various "experiments" from the health food store. He has been trying to see if that item is what he is lacking etc... We also have 2 grocery bags FULL in our storage room of abandoned experiment herbs/pills etc...
He also has a stack at least an inch thick (poss more) of lab tests he's had over the years. He sits and compares results from years ago to now to see if anything is consistantly off.
Sorry about my bummer posts lately. I was just talking to hubby about my blog being such a downer lately. I don't get out much (take the kids to/from school, grocery store and church is all I get to do)... My days are very similar one day to the next. I promise I will try to be more upbeat and find more positives to talk about. This is my release of stress area. I have to be the backbone of the family so much and I need a place to vent or I think I will implode. I keep telling myself that life won't be like this forever. I just have to get through another day and tomorrow may be better..... if the past shows us the future, most likely it will be the same or worse.
It's alright.. as long as I keep having hope I can keep heading in a forward direction.
It also helps to have a good book to escape with... BTW.. Annette I'm to the part where Harry, Ron and Hermione are about to sneak past Hagrid's dog Fluffy and jump down into the dark unknown under the trap door. And... Thanks for thinking of us and acquiring the pullups at a discount. Much appreciated.
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